Numerous problems

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    Hi I’m hoping to get your views on the horrible pain my wife is suffering.
    My wife has always had issues with pain but recently, over past few months everything has got so much worse.
    The areas of pain my wife is currently trying to deal with are as folllows
    Shoulder pains – both shoulders are very sore, especially the right shoulder which is almost unbearable to touch.
    vaginal pain – this is the most distressing – she indescrimitely get horrible burning pain which always comes with a burning sensation in the feet.
    Lower back pain – pains in her coccyx and hips.
    We’ve spent the last few months seeing a specialist who has scanned her spine and found no issues to explain the pain. My wife has had an injection to ease the shoulder pain which worked for a while but is now worse than ever We are also seeing a specialist to try and get some relief for the vaginal condition but so far no success there.
    Because all these issues are happening at the same time it’s really affecting my wife’s quality of life and making her very depressed.
    It seems too much of a coincidence to me that all these conditions are happening at the same time.
    I’d really appreciate anyone’s views on what my wife is going through and what we can do to hopefully get the right treatment.

    Much love and thanks xx.



    Hi Stuart, sorry to hear you plight about your wife, I have no idea of what your wife has, but sounds either neuropathic or something to do with blood some inflamation or such like, but I am no dr. as for depression, i have found that CBT and mindfulness has worked well for me, also try looking at the top of page under Pain relief, that will give you ideas, of how she can cope and deal with the pain better, I do understand what it is like living with persistent ,constant pain and been like it for nearly 23 years, but it sounds like you need to go back and try to get to a pain clinic through you GP, to try and get the pain under more control. this needs further investigation. I hope your wife gets this matter sorted soon , take care and best wishes. Lee



    Sorry, to hear about your wifes pain issues. She certainly sounds in a horrible place.

    Is there any chance she might be Diabetic ?.

    Im type II, but a normal weight, not overweight. My pain clinic did a blood test and found out i was diabetic type II. With my Pancreas diseased.

    Now the thing here is, that left un-noticed it causes Nerve damage over the whole of your body. Which in turn causes severe pain.
    I also have ME, which additionally by nature amplifies pain signals even more. For me it felt like my legs were on fire.

    Thankfully due to the marvelous team at St. Thomas, i have had Spinal Cord Stimulation surgery and my pain is now reduced 75% or more. I dont need any pain killers anymore.

    The key for my journey was finding a Pain Clinic that cared and actually knew what they were doing. That took me 17yrs.
    So St. Thomas in London is worth a look if your GP can refer your wife.



    Just thought i would add the story about my mum. As it shows that Pain can be caused by all manor of things.

    My mum suffered with stomach pains, and lower bowel / private area pains for 15yrs or so. So bad she lived on OraMorph. She was quite skinny, and a very heavy smoker.

    Unfortunately it came too late for my mum as she past away shortly after her pain diagnosis with cancer caused by her smoking.
    It turned out her pain for all those years was caused by a blockage in the major artery that feeds the lower stomach and bowl area. So in effect her lower organs were being starved of blood supply. No one ever picked this up until it was too late.
    We found out later that this can be quite common in smokers.
    As i say, sadly too late for my mum, and those horrible white sticks got the better of her.


    Helen H

    Hi Stuart
    Obviously you are already being very active in pursuing a diagnosis. I just wanted to offer my sympathies to you both. I have pudendal pain, as well as hips and the pelvic and sacral area relating to ME and the oversensitivity of my nervous system. Pain in this area is so distressing, and can be really hard to cope with.

    I have had to make many adaptions to how I sit and lie down, what I wear etc. It could definitely be worth trying out some supportive foam/cushions etc.

    As you are in this process of waiting for answers you can help your wife by encouraging her to be active in managing her mental health. ( I do of course know that her pain is a big strain on you too.) For me counselling was really helpful, and anti depressants too.

    Take care

    • This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by  Helen H.


    Hi Stuart, I hope your wife finds a diagnosis to what is going on as it will mean that you have a better idea of how to make it more comfortable and will have more of an idea of what line to go down, to be able to cope better, too. but either way its all trial and error to what works, I’m afraid as what methods of drugs and alternative medicine works for one, does’t mean it works for your wife, but on this site there is a lot of people who have tried most things, and will be able to point you in the right direction. you both have my empathy, it is a horrible place to be in, and a diagnosis to what is causing this, is helpful, regardless to being in pain,but as I have said before the pain needs to be under some control and treatment for depression is a start, while these tests are going on to try and find a cause. take care and best wishes to you both. Lee



    Can I just say how grateful I am for all the responses I’ve had since I posted. I really appreciate you taking your time to reach out and offer your advice.
    As time moves on I think we it seems likely that my wife’s problems with her shoulders and in her vaginal area are not related. The vaginal problems are the most distressing. The pain is like a constant toothache and can flare up occasionally but mostly in the evening and always comes with burning feet. Her feet go hot and red and a little swollen. However they don’t stay like that for long and can quickly go back to normal.
    It’s important to point out that in the morning the vaginal pain is a lot less so my wife can get on with her life. Every day however the pain and burning feet will kick in so they have to be related, however I haven’t found anything on the internet that could suggest what the actual condition is.
    Any ideas?



    Hi Stuart , it is very hard to actually diagnose symptoms as it can be any number of things and the pains could or could not be related to each other.AS a stab in the dark , the only one I could think of with shoulder pain and back and pelvic pain, pain in feet ect. in women is fibromyalgia . but don’t take my word as I’m no DR. but know it is a difficult one to diagnose for some GP ect. as it’s a problem that varies from one person to another.
    But the main thing is to get her pain under control and get help with her mental health as mentioned above, if your wife is struggling.
    Hope you find a diagnosis soon, and keep us informed. take care and best wishes . Lee



    I have a feeling that burning feet can be related to being hypothyroid, Stuart. Is that worth looking into?

    At the back of my mind is something I heard on Woman’s Hour about vaginal pain. I will try to recall it.

    It sounds a horrible situation.


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